Ok, I know a few of my readers are too young to remember a comic strip, a cartoon, or a television show called Dennis the Menace ( I saw it in syndication during Nick at Night in the 80s and 90s). It was about a neighborhood boy that always managed to find ways to get himself into trouble, most often than not doing something to and or with his neighbor “MR. WILLLLLLLLLSOOOON!” I added the extra letters for those of you who remember that iconic call from the neighborhood boy. Dennis of course was a child whose curisoty and his well-meaning attempts to help always found him in some kind of shinangin. Well Dennis the Meance has grown up, is 14, and my new neighbor.
In the past six months, my street in the neighborhood has changed. Military families have moved in and out, I have seen retirement parties culminate by putting the house for sale and moving to Florida, and a new population of youth and vitality is forcing everyone to keep themselves alert. In a way, it is very similar to the way I grew up on base. However, I digress.
My new neighbor, for the purposes of this story we will call Dennis, asked me to mow my yard ( how classically American), and because I had other things to do I said yes and gave him 20 bucks. Harmless enough, right? Well imagine my surprise when I came home from work to see one of my hedges “trimmed” beyond recognition. At first, I thought one of my former students was trying to play some kind of joke on me, but then Dennis came out and fessed up. He was trying to make the 20 dollars’ worth it, by trimming my hedge. The only problem with that was the shrub was bigger than him, and he never trimmed a shrub before. I should have known it wasn’t done by vandals when I looked around and saw that, for the most part, the mutilated remains of the shrub lied at the curb in a reasonably neat pile ready for pickup. I had to ask him, “what… the…hell” and his response to my question was “Please don’t tell my dad. He’ll think I’m a dumbass.” I did the only thing I could do: Laugh and laugh hard. After I finished laughing I told him to pick up the poor limbs of the bush that lay scattered around my yard before church on Wednesday and sent him back to his home.
I told this story to some friends and they wondered why I wasn’t mad. As I reflect on the situation it is simple: Dennis has a work ethic and a value for a dollar bill. Not only that, when it was time to fess up he owned his mistakes. Dennis didn’t lie or try to blame it on somebody else; he came out there by himself to accept whatever the punishment maybe like a man. I got to see that true American Values are still being taught and passed on. Work Hard, Be truthful, and stay honest, and that in this climate and generation was very refreshing.
So to Dennis: You’re a good kid. Honest and hardworking. So, as long as your father doesn’t ask me what happened to the bush, I won’t tell him. But remember the next time you want to go ham on some shrubs go into the backyard! Have at it: if you go missing we will send someone in after you. And I am sure this is only the first of many tales to come. After all, you are a red-blooded American boy. We’ve all been there. Welcome to the Neighborhood.
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